Friday, August 2, 2013

This is Me

I've probably said this before, so forgive me if you find me repetitive.

Sometimes live is a bowl of cherries. Sometimes life is just the pits.

Usually, it's a mixture of both.

Today's been kind of a pit day so far, so of course I find myself on my blog writing about well, writing.

I gotta be me. Sometimes I find myself trying to stuff a square peg in a round hole and then I step back and realize that I have to do things my way in order to be the best me I can be.

Let's get a bit less cryptic.

Take publishing my books. While I won't rule out traditional publishing in my future, I have found I really, really like self publishing. I'm not great at marketing, true, and lately it's been bugging me that my books don't get as much attention as I'd like. The real issue is--at least I think it is--that my target audience has no idea these books are out there. There are tons of great books to read and they just haven't found mine yet.

And, of course, the last thing I published was last year so I'm not on anyone's radar.

But that needs to be okay. Right now, it is what it is.

I'm working currently working on three major projects. One is the final book in my YA fantasy series. Two is a contemporary, serious novel. Three is a dystopian fantasy. There are more, but I'm focusing on these three right now. The thing is, life just threw my family a major curve ball and I think I took it right in the gut.

I'm going to take the walk. The ump said so.

So, writing my books. I still have to be me. I have to write them and publish them on my terms, in my way. It may not be the best way, but I guess I'm just one of those people who have to carve out their own niche. I'm not the fastest, even though I want to be. But setting up a bunch of expectations just leaves me disappointed and empty.

I'm still going to try to get The Lost Princess done and in print by Nov 30th. I can do that. I still have time, and I'm more than halfway done. But at the moment there's a ton of things going on in my life and most of the big ones aren't good. In fact, right now I need my writing more than I have in the recent past because it will help get me through this mess, help me focus and pour out my feelings and leave me better for it on the other side.

I did that before, back in 2002 when I miscarried Lily. Writing kept me sane then. I'm relying on it now. I did that when I finished The Tyrant King. I did it in high school when I first wrote The Peasant Queen (and other things I will never subject you to--you're welcome).

Because writing is my lifeline as well as my business, I'm focusing on the lifeline aspect of it. In a month or so I will probably be more ready to take on the business part. But not now.

Thanks for listening.

1 comment:

melissa teater said...

I think you are amazing! Keep your head up and do whatever you feel is right. Everything happens for a reason and it will all be worth the wait. If you ever need to talk, I am always here. Love u lady!